Day 15: School

The amount of not wanting to go to school in me astounding. I'm stressed out about keeping good grades, dealing with Natalie's shit, and not making an idiot out of myself. I have to keep this valence between friends, and parents and teachers. I have to act like I don't care about school around my friends, and I have to act like I really care around my parents and teachers. I have to get good grades, but not let anyone know. I have to do bad on tests that my friends will ask me what I got on, and I have to get good grades for the things my parents will ask about. I shoot for C's mostly. I don't even know how good I really am. I don't even know what I want anymore.